Not only can a baby learn a new language also musical and artistic abilities, muscular coordination, moral values and the values of life, knowing the difference between what is right and wrong. They learn from those in their environment, by listening, watching and interacting.
There is a correct timetable for this learning to come, for the best results, and that time is during the formative years. This process begins at birth. It’s bonding. Mother looks lovingly into her baby’s eyes, talks to the baby, kisses and hugs the baby. Maternal instincts are stirred as baby looks at mom and feels safe and secure in her arms. If the mother nurses the child this creates a deep bond. This is the beginning of a child’s personality development in feeling loved, safe, secure, and confident. As an adult they will carry these traits with them and in turn others will feel that way with them.
While the mother may be more affectionate in a softer way the father may tickle the child throw them up in the air and be a little more physical. This balances the child; both mother and father play the key role in the bond that will last a lifetime. With lots of hugs and kisses from both parents before kindergarten, this child is more likely to develop successful friendships, marriages and careers in the future.
Also, hold your child while rocking in a rocking chair. Read to them as they feel secure on your lap. Talk to your child and listen to what they are saying, teach them what’s right and wrong, and make sure that what you are teaching them is how you are living because they are inclined to copy what you do. Don’t be a hypocrite, children get confused by this. Children are very curious and ask a lot of why’s, don’t get irritated, this is their time to grow, do your best to explain why the sky is blue, why are your eyes so big? Why do they have to take a nap. Keep your explanation simple and clear, make it fun.
Many parents have to work to earn a living to take care of their children, so can you both of you put forth the effort to spend time with your children? Don’t put in a few hours with your child because you feel guilty, really do your best to spend quantity time (and quality) find the time during the formative years or be prepared to reap a generation gap when they become a teenager.
Not only can this be damaging to the child but also the parents as they miss out on enjoying their child as they grow up. They now look to their peers for advice and fun. When they get older and the parent tries to spend time with them out of guilt, they now draw away and a huge gap is formed, the child no longer trusts the parents.
So spending pieces of time that have real meaning, are truly important, going camping, bike riding, discussing a book, going over a test, when they tell you they got an A in school do you ask them why they did not get an A+? Be encouraging to your child, but don’t let them have their way in everything, the child that is given everything and has no discipline turns into a selfish, demanding, uncaring adult. If you practice what you preach and teach from infancy between what is right and wrong, your child will have those values in their hearts for the rest of their lives, if you are a hypocrite, a liar, and show no affection or very little to your child your child will also carry those values into the future.
The kind of adult you want your child to become depends much on you. So when they look into your eyes what do they see? Someone that is loving and kind and there for them, or a person that’s flaky, selfish and there when it is convenient for them? In children and youth over the past two decades. We lose some ten thousand teenagers a year over drug related abuse that does not include those that are injured and maimed. One in four teen-agers drinks to excess every two weeks and we have two million alcoholic teenagers.
“Teenage girls in America get pregnant at the rate of one million per year, twice the rate of the next Western country, England. Suicide has tripled among teenagers in the last 20 years, and between five and six thousand teen-agers take their own lives each year. “Why?” they feel unloved, misunderstood, and alone and unwanted. It takes time and energy to love a child, ask yourself? (“what kind of adult am I raising?”) Years ago Robert Keeshan, broadcaster to children as Captain Kangaroo, warned of the consequences of withholding your time from your children. He said: “A small child waits, thumb in mouth, doll in hand with some impatience, the arrival home of a parent. She wishes to relate some small sandbox experience. She is excited to share the thrill she has known that day. The time comes, the parent arrives. Beaten down by the stresses of the workplace the parent so often says to the child, ‘not now honey. I’m busy, go watch television.’ Years go by and the child grows. We give her toys and clothes, the latest cell phone, designer clothes. But we do not give her what she wants most, our time. She’s fourteen, her eyes are glassy, and she’s into something. ‘Honey, what’s happening? Talk to me, talk to me.’ Too late. Love has passed by...
“When we say to a child, ‘Not now, later.’ When we say, ‘Go watch TV.’ When we fail to give our young people the one thing they require of us, our time. When we fail to love a child. We are not uncaring. We are simply too busy to love a child. In the future perhaps that child will turn into an adult that is too busy to love a child. Even worse perhaps they will be too busy to love even themselves.
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